JOURNAL
Why it hurts our feelings when clients cancel: the human side of the 24-hour policy
Let's be honest about something most therapy practices dance around: when you cancel without 24 hours' notice, it genuinely hurts our feelings. Not in a dramatic, wounded healer way—but in the very real, human way that happens when someone we care about suddenly disappears from a space we've prepared specifically for them.
We ask for 24 hours' notice because we're running a business, yes. But that dry explanation misses the fuller truth of why last-minute cancellations sting. Your therapist isn't just protecting their schedule—they're protecting their capacity to show up fully for everyone who needs them, including you.
Here's what happens when you text us thirty minutes before your session: we can't fill that space. A late cancellation or no-show appointment hurts at least three people: you, your therapist, and another client who could have potentially utilized that time slot.
Think about it this way—while a medical doctor can see 35 patients in a day, a therapist generally sees a maximum of 6 to 8 clients a day. We reserve a full hour of our time for you, for the session and clinical notes. When that hour suddenly vanishes, we can't magic another appointment out of thin air to replace the lost income or redistribute that carefully planned energy.
But here's the part we don't usually say out loud: it's not just about the money.
We prepare for you. We review your file, think about where we left off last session, maybe even ponder questions we want to explore together. We clear our mental space and ready ourselves to be fully present for whatever you bring. When you don't show up, all that preparation just... sits there.
At the same time, you may experience your own emotional impact when a client cancels last-minute—frustration, weariness, or blows to your self-esteem. Sometimes we wonder if we said something wrong last session. Sometimes we worry about you. Sometimes we feel disappointed because we were looking forward to continuing important work together.
These aren't character flaws in your therapist—they're human responses to human relationships. And therapy, despite all its professional boundaries and clinical frameworks, is fundamentally a human relationship.
When you cancel last-minute, you're not just affecting that one hour. Missing therapy sessions disrupt the continuity of treatment, making it harder for clients to develop coping strategies. This inconsistency often leads to slower progress. The work we do together has momentum, and cancellations interrupt that flow for both of us.
Meanwhile, each missed appointment can represent $100 or more in lost revenue. Multiply that by how many appointments you miss each month, and it could be in the thousands. For many therapists—especially those starting out or managing other responsibilities—this isn't just an inconvenience. It's rent money. It's grocery money. It's the difference between being able to do this work sustainably or burning out.
Many therapists aren't seeing clients full-time. We might be teaching, writing, caring for family members, or working other jobs to make ends meet. We've arranged our entire week around your Tuesday at 3 PM. When you cancel last-minute, we can't suddenly pick up a shift somewhere else or magically generate income to replace what we've lost.
This isn't about greed—it's about the basic economics of being able to continue doing this work. If you charge $150 per session and get one last-minute cancellation per week, by year's end, your revenue could be $7,500 short. That's a $625 monthly loss for just one cancellation.
When we ask for 24 hours' notice, we're asking for something pretty reasonable: the same consideration you'd give a friend, a doctor, or a hair stylist. We're asking you to treat our shared work with the same respect you'd want if someone was planning to spend an hour focused entirely on your wellbeing.
Receiving a text message from a client 30 minutes before their scheduled session asking to cancel the appointment may seem easy to accommodate, however it also means an hour that you were not able to see another client. It means another person who might desperately need that slot remains on a waiting list.
Here's something most practices won't tell you: our cancellation policies aren't punishment systems. They're protection systems—for you as much as for us. Having a no show policy will help patients avoid missed appointments and increase consistency in attendance.
When we hold boundaries around time and attendance, we're modeling something crucial: that this work matters enough to prioritize, that your healing journey deserves consistency, and that both our time and yours has value.
We get it—emergencies happen. We will only waive this fee in the event of serious or contagious illness, extreme weather, or other unavoidable circumstances. We're not monsters. We understand that cars break down, kids get sick, and life sometimes demands immediate attention.
What we're asking for is the difference between "I'm too stressed to come today" (understandable, but please tell us 24 hours in advance when possible) and "I'm in the emergency room" (obviously, just let us know when you can).
Our 24-hour cancellation policy isn't really about the money, though the money matters. It's not really about schedule efficiency, though that matters too. It's about creating a container for this work that respects everyone involved—your time, our time, and the time of other people who need support.
When you honor our 24-hour policy, you're saying: this work matters. My healing matters. My therapist's capacity to do this work sustainably matters. The other people who might need this time slot matter.
And honestly? That feels good. It feels like partnership rather than one-sided accommodation. It feels like we're in this together, working toward your goals within a framework that honors everyone's humanity.
Your feelings matter in this space—all of them, including the ones that make you want to skip sessions. Our feelings matter too, including the ones that get hurt when you disappear without warning. Both can be true at the same time. Both can be honored within a system that's clear, boundaried, and ultimately caring.
That's not too much to ask. That's just what it looks like when people treat each other with basic respect—even in professional relationships, even when one person is paying the other. Especially then.
Need to cancel? We get it. Just give us 24 hours when you can, and we'll work together to find a time that serves you better. Your healing matters too much to leave to chance.